Grace, not perfection : Chronicles of a bad Mom
Parenting is hard. So hard! I mean let's be real. Kids poop in their pants, cry when they're hungry, throw crap in your face, and vomit on your new Free People dress. And then...they need to learn how to read, ride a bike, and tie their own shoes. Not to mention...they want to attend birthday parties on Saturdays when you are just so.dang.tired.
Then...you have to feed them organic free range breast fed sweater wearing chickens. I mean...what.in.the.world?! Crazy right?
It's hard! The decisions. The responsibilities. THE OPINIONS!!! #somanyopinions
In this day and age we are expected to do it all with a smile on our face and a crown on our head while wearing red bottom heels. (What's up with those anyway?!) Make a mistake and you are doomed. Doomed by the stranger in the grocery store, doomed by the lady glaring at you in the ice cream shop, doomed by the gentleman playing on FB in Starbucks (You didn't think he was actually working on that computer did you?), doomed by the social media keyboard nazis. They're real y'all! And they're brutal!
Picture it...
You're in Target with your precious, sweet angel of a child. He sees the $3 Star Wars Lego set sitting in the "shit you don't need but usually buy anyway" section. You know what I'm talking about. It's the same spot in the checkout lane holding the Reese's and Funyuns that you grab while waiting for the woman in front of you to sort through her coupons.
So...your kid sees this toy that he doesn't need. But he insists on having it. You tell him no. He whines. You tell him no again. He yells. You give him "the look" and threaten his life in the softest whisper. He SCREAMS. You ignore him. He's still yelling. You lose your shit. Fun times!
Then you look over your shoulder and the stranger behind you is glaring at you. They are giving you the look of death. Because you know...their kid is a perfect angel. Always.
You get nervous. You forget to scan the cartwheel app. You can't find your red card. Disaster!
So you scurry out the door and your child is still screaming. You try to load the groceries into your car as fast as possible (so you can get home and lock yourself in the bathroom) all the while...another stranger is walking by you staring at you. The shame!
So much judgment.
Why...why are we so quick to judge? Why do we assume perfection? What happened to grace?
Parenting is hard. I suck at it on a regular basis. Sometimes I feel like a bad Mom. But...I have to give myself grace. I have to realize that I am human. I have to realize that my child is not perfect.
We, as parents, need to realize that we are doing the best we can. We all deserve a pat on the back. Go ahead. Do it. You deserve it!
Even if you:
• Bought that Lego set after saying “no” 5 times
• Let your child eat a bag of chips for breakfast
• Skip bath time because he went swimming earlier that day
• Let your son pee next to the car in the parking lot because you didn't feel like walking inside
• Throw away toys while your child is at a sleepover
• Tell your child the ice cream man plays music when he’s out of ice cream
• Put super glue on a cut that might have needed stitches
• Told your child his friends birthday party was cancelled because you were too tired to bring him
• Sent your child to school in unwashed uniforms
• Tell them to go watch tv when they wake up before you on Saturday morning
• Play bumper carts in Target (TRY IT! SO FUN!)
We, as a society, need to realize that we have two choices when it comes to people, to see the good or see the bad. When you choose to see the good, you will live a life of compassion. People will see the good in you. This is how you live a peaceful life.
So next time you see that Mom holding back all.the.cuss.words when her son throws a fit for an overpriced Lego set, give her a little grace. Lend her a hand, unload her groceries for her, and flash her a smile. She's doing the best she can!